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I'm in love with my best friend
notamused02
Dear Readers,
I would be pleased to have your input on this so please don't refrain from commenting. A year and a half ago, I started getting close to this guy named Matthew. I didn't like him at the time because I was with my ex that I was in love with. We shared a mutual friend and he was in all of my classes.My ex and this friend, Thomas, played ice hockey together and I went to all of their hockey games. Matt, Olivia(my best friend), and I went to one together and he made me laugh so hard,  I cried. From that point on, even when I was down, he always did some impression that was hysterical to me. I loved it when he made me laugh. I started developing feelings for him.. Then, our high school went on a trip to New England area and I grew even closer to him. I told Thomas, which was not a good idea. So he blabbed to Matt. He started pulling away from me after that.I knew I had to break it off with david. Here I was having feelings for someone else and I felt so guilty about it. I've had guys after that. I have sex with them, and then I just don't care about them anymore. The few people I've cared about, I haven't had sex with. I wonder why. I guess I'm too scared.
 There have been times this year when I've hung out with him and I don't have the balls to kiss him or anything. 
He says I'm cute but he knows too much about me. It's probably true. He likes all these girls but they just seem to fade away and I've always stuck around. All my friends have tried to get us together, not even telling me. I really have no idea what to do. I can't move on because I go to school with him. But any helpful ideas?

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